little pitter patter

We awoke to find evidence of tiny little leprechaun feet all around this morning....

...but upon closer examination....

... it was actually tiny littlemiss feet, cleverly disguised!

(seriously, could I be any luckier?)

{Happy St Patrick's Day}

...and CHEERS to you and yours!

It looks as if....

she's finally

had enough

of tummy time!!

(you might want to mute it, unless you like ridiculous mama talk)

sometimes...

... I wish my blog was private for all the same reasons that other people's blogs are private. {privacy for family/littles, potential weirdos viewing, control over who has access, ability to be more open? and etc}

Well... sometimes I wish it was private simply so I could document a better picture of my latest war wound. And by 'war wound' I mean simply carrying on with life wound. I know that I've never been described as particularly graceful or coordinated, but come on. Just this winter alone, I've fallen on the ice and scraped my knees twice (and keep in mind, I've barely even left the house this winter). And remember this awesome 'war wound'?

I've been at it again... this time I fell down the stairs... just simply fell down the stairs, not running to save Leah from a burning fire, hurrying to answer the door, rushing to get a diet coke or anything like that. I just fell fast and I fell HARD. Luckily Leah was oblivious as she was hanging out in her mamaroo, because I probably laid there for 5 minutes groaning and feeling like something must be broken. If I would've had my phone on me, I may have called for LifeFlight. Oh man did it hurt.

It happened over a week ago and this is a close up of what the bruise looked like this morning. It's a little blurred for obvious reasons and the scale is jacked up being an extreme close-up... but know that it's the size of a salad plate, the colors are unbelievably beautiful and it still hurts like h.e.doublehockeysticks.

:not awesome:

and while we wait for spring...

It's so close,

I know it must be...

however we're expecting snow again tonight.

The waiting, wishing and hoping for
blue skies,
birds chirping,
tulips blooming
and
warm sun shining is killing us over here

...so here's a little of what we've been up to lately while we watch and wait...

{CRAFTING}

necklaces like this. (tutorial found here)

and bazillions of hairflowers like this

(and some like the poms on the necklace)

{READING}

Recently finished The Island as well as Speak, Secret Journal of Brett Colton and The Alchemist (again)

Currently reading (and loving) this! Ironically this has been on my to-read list for well over 18months, but until recently I haven't read much but pregnancy and parenting books. I'm so glad I finally got to it. All of the many recommendations that I got on this book were true. It's a good one!

Next up: Cutting for Stone, Sugar Queen, The Road to Home and A Long Way Gone.

And we're also reading lots of these kind of books around here. Here's a pile of some of our favorites. (some are littlemiss' favs and some are my favs!)

{CHEERING}

for all of our favorite teams!

It's been quite an eventful and exciting season for both of our favorite basketball teams and we've all been on the edge of our seats around here to see what on earth could happen next.

Go Jazz! Go Cougs!

{LISTENING TO}

This is currently our favorite daily background theme music. It's full of silly, fun and sweet songs performed by people like Sarah Mclachlan, Jerry Garcia, Bob Dylan, Keb 'Mo and others. It's full of great sing-along songs that Leah loves, including my Grandma Leah's favorite {frog went a 'courtin}, but they're catchy enough that I actually really like it too!

We're also a bit obsessed with Adele right now. 21 is amazing.

{EATING}

This is our go-to favorite right now. I can't seem to get enough of the roasted winter/root veggies these last few months. We're eating some combination several nights a week lately. This batch is a mix of rutabaga, parsnips, butternut squash, carrots, red potatoes and sweet onions, tossed simpy with olive oil, sea salt and pepper. Soooo good. I have yet to try a combination that isn't totally delish so I use whatever veggies I have on hand (turnips, beets, zucchini and mushrooms are some other favorites), we've also seasoned with cumin & cinnamon as well as lemon pepper. Seriously, yummy.

But don't worry, just to keep things balanced, I've also been eating waaayyyy more of these than I care to admit!

{PLAYDATES}

(pic borrowed from Allisen's blog)

...with Leah's adorable boyfriend Sawyer (who's just 4 days older than her) and his cute mama!

...and with her sweet, little cousin Lydia (only 12 days older) and some of my favorite girls!
I can't tell you how big she smiles every time she sees Lydia. They are no doubt going to be the best of friends growing up and I love it!!

...and of course, plenty of playdates at Grandma's house

(she IS grandma's girl, afterall)

And that is a little of how we've been passing the time...

Life is good as we wait for spring and dream of a little more time outdoors!

five

five months old.

hard to believe.

time has always been such an interesting phenomenon to me, but even more so since becoming a mama. I am much more keenly aware of how quickly the weeks and months go by... the changes, learning, growth and development in Leah magnify the time zipping by so much. However, I continue to be in awe of how difficult and long many of the days can be, even while the months are flying by. strange.

Littlemiss is still the light of our lives and somehow I manage to fall in love with her just a little bit more each day. She never ceases to delight me and I still feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

She survived her first cold this month and it was bug that wasn't kind to anyone in our house. She was pretty miserable for about a week with a terrible cough and loads of congestion. We spent lots of time snuggling in hot, steamy bathrooms and breathing over the top of the humidifier. It was the first time that she's ever been really clingy, wanting me over anyone else. It was equal parts sweet, humbling and terrifying. The fact that she looked to me for comfort both made me feel good and also terrified me. Moms are amazing, I know a little somthing about having a mom that somehow seems to make everything better. It is scary to know that I'm the mom now, and sometimes I can't make everything better. :(

Other than being sick, she is still sleeping pretty good at night. She goes down between 8 and 9pm and wakes up anywhere between 6 and 8am. Naps are still pretty iffy and inconsistent. Usually we get an hour-ish morning nap and the rest of the day, we fight for anything we can get! :)

We're starting to think about starting solid foods (rice cereal and maybe some veggies), but have no immediate plans. We've decided to wait until closer to the 6mos side of 4-6mos! She's still nursing great and I don't want to rush her. She seems pretty content!

She loves her hands and has improved so much with her dexterity. She grabs toys, moves them from hand to hand, drops things, picks them up again. I love watching her figure new things out. She still loves to suck on her hands and has now found her favorite fingers...

Sometimes it's just one finger...


usually it's both!

She's also recently discovered her feet and is pretty enamored with them. She's realized that she's limber and catch actually reach her toes, unlike most of us!


She still loves to take baths

She squeals happy sounds most of the time and has the cutest giggle ever. Mama and Daddy will do almost any ridiculous thing to coax it out of her.

She is learning to be a bit more manipulative with her cries. She has a new one that's kind-of whiney and totally fake. She uses it mostly as a warning cry.

She has a temper. She can go from really happy to really mad really fast.

She is very social. Other than when she was sick, she has smiles for most people these days. She especially loves babies and other little people.

She's still a big fan of her cute little friend in the mirror. She always has a smile for her. It's ridiculously adorable.

She loves music and definitely has her favorites on my ipod. We sing lots and lots of songs throughout the day and lots of times, she's starting to try and join in. She likes both mom's versions and dad's versions of her favorite songs, which coincidentally are very different. (Chris doesn't actually know the words to most songs, just the basic premise. His latest Popcorn Popping version went a little something like this... "Oh I think my eyes did decieve me so, popcorn was popping on the apricot tree".... HUH?
He's sick of me correcting him, so we've decided that he'll sing his way and I'll sing the right way.

She loves books and loves sitting on my lap in the rocking chair going through all of her favorites.

She drools like crazy!!

She seems to know her name and turns and looks at us when we say it. She also goes by a few nicknames... most commonly ellejay, as in LJ... (a little something her daddy picked up from his endless episodes of LD's Curb Your Enthusiasm) She also goes regularly by littlemiss, (of course) and also lovey (we got that from her pediatricians office. Her New Zealand born nurse always calls her either lovey or a cute little possum??)

Peek and Boo, Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes, Little Bunny FooFoo and Tiny Turtle are among some of her favorite games and songs.

She is still a swaddled only sleeper. At this rate, I feel like we'll be swaddling until she's 3

She's not even close to rolling over and seems to have no desire to go anywhere. She'll wiggle and twist and turn while on her back, but doesn't seem to have any desire to push herself, which is fine by me. I'm really loving her as an immobile little cutie!

Every morning, I tell her in awe, that she's managed to get even cuter overnight. Because it's true. And somehow my heart keeps growing too... even when I feel like it couldn't possibly swell anymore... it does.



Just like Big Nutbrown Hare in one of our favorite stories...

I love her right up to the moon.... and back!

i love to see the temple...

Littlemiss and I snuck out of the house today for an impromtu lunch date. We met some of our favorite ladies downtown at the Blue Lemon on G's lunch hour. The food was divine and the company was even better. Leah and her cute, little friend Caroline were both so good while the mama's got to enjoy themselves.

Lunch went too quickly and we hadn't quite had enough of being out of the house, so Leah and I decided to stroll over to Deseret Book and peruse all of the books on our wish list. We saw some of our already favorite books, read lots of new books and added several more to our growing wish list. (I really, really love children's books)

All that reading made Littlemiss a little sleepy and low and behold, she was fast asleep in her cozy ride, before we even got out of the store. Not wanting to waste a 54 degree downtown day and a little break in the clouds, we took off across the street to enjoy a stroll in one of my favorite places.

The temple was so beautiful as the clouds rolled by and the sun tried to sneak out. It was one of those days where I felt as if I couldn't inhale deeply enough. I wanted to drink up every minute of being right, exactly where I was.

If I didn't already have a case of spring fever worse than I've ever had, being there sure did do the trick. But guess what we found starting to peek up from the ground?

....that's right...

::TULIP BULBS::

(it certainly can't be long now, right)

Littlemiss slept though most of it, but I think she loved it just the same...

She did wake up for a brief moment, but realized that life was better than ever.... and went right back to sleep!!!

(but I was atleast able to capture this mama-n-me shot)

My final stop at the reflection pond made me do just that.

I am a lucky girl indeed.

mine

{wow}

ireallyreallyreallylovethisman!

Yesterday was one of those days in which his goodness totally amazed me.

from start to finish.

lucky me.

xo

cupid caught a bug...

...and it might be the saddest thing I've ever seen. :(

Not a lot of smiles today, but lots of snuggly lovin' for mama!

Happy Valentine's Day!

really?!?

one year ago this very day....

my life was forever and completely changed by a little white stick.

Ok, so actually it was a bunch of white sticks.

I wouldn't say that I had given up on ever finding myself pregnant, but I was surely beyond even hopefully expecting it.

I had stopped tracking every day of my cycle and long since given up on the every single month pregnancy tests.

After aggressively trying for nearly 3 years, tons of procedures, lots of drugs and constant bad news and let-downs... we were starting to move on to other options.

We were mid-way through the adoption application process, having completed all of our letters of recommendations, education classes, background checks and the first round of interviews.

Along with that, I had begun some alternative treatments to help balance my body out after a long road of endless clomid and other fertility drugs.

Finally after a lot of heartache, we were feeling some peace about where we were headed.

It was the week that we were house sitting for our neighbors who were in Costa Rica and watching their 4 kids. It was a bit of a crazy week, (more about that here) Chris and I were both going non-stop and usually in different directions through-out the week trying to get everyone where they needed to go.

It was a Wednesday morning, I took the littlest peewee to preschool and then joyfully welcomed the 3 hours that I would have all to myself!

First on the agenda was my weekly acupuncture appt, something that I had actually started to look forward to each week, and if there was ever a week that I needed that meditation time, it was that week!!

When I arrived and did the usual catch-up with Lisa, one of the questions that she always asked was what day of my cycle I was on. Because she specializes in women's health, the pressure points that she focuses on each week depend specifically on what part of your cycle you are on.

I had to think for a minute, before telling her that I was on day 33. Nothing unusual there, I was used to having semi irregular cycles and day 33 wasn't any more unusual than day 23.

She proceeded to ask (to my annoyance) if I was having any symptoms that would indicate that auntie florence was on her way or maybe even indications of a pregnancy.

Nope. (again, nothing unusual there)

"Well, we'll just do this treatment as if you could possibly be pregnant then."

Excuse me? Are you kidding me!! I don't get pregnant!!

That's why I'm here, remember?!

Honestly, I remember feeling so irritated that she was even insinuating that. My normal quiet, tranquil period was now full of angst and what ifs all of the sudden.

After leaving Lisa's office, I had to stop at the grocery store and pick up a couple of things with my last hour of free time. My mind was still on "we'll just do this treatment as if you could be pregnant"

I knew that I would drive myself crazy with wonder, (something I had felt I'd finally "gotten over") so a twin pack of epts somehow ended up in my cart.

I had to stop by our house to pick up some clean clothes and a few things, so the first thing I did?

Yep... you guessed it?

Like so many times before, I remember sitting there with my pants around my ankles watching the 2 vertical lines show up pretty quickly, but then something that had never happened before... slowly a horizontal line started to appear, clearing making a + sign.

Here's where I wish there had been a little recorder going in my mind.

You must have done it wrong. Wait...how do you do it wrong? You just pee. You've peed on hundreds of these. But, you don't get pregnant. That can't be right. This one's bad. Something's wrong.

After a big drink of water and about 7 minutes and 23 seconds, the second stick was ripped open and there we went again.

Same thing. Another clear +

They must be expired. Nope, not until 2012. Maybe it's a bad batch. I should note this lot number. (and on and on and on)

The crazy thing is that never once, not even once did I ever think of calling Chris, which seems so crazy to me now. I was convinced that it couldn't really be true and I didn't want to disappoint him.

By now, it was time to go pick up peewee from preschool. So I did what any other doubter might do.... I stopped at RiteAid and bought every single brand of pregnancy tests that they had. Yep, every single one.

$84 worth, thankyouverymuch.

I spent the afternoon watching UP with peewee, drinking water, eating gross mickey mouse shaped chicken nuggets and sneaking off to the bathroom every 30 minutes or so to pee on another stick.

One after another showed the various positive results; pregnant, +, ll.

For some reason, I still couldn't believe it and I still hadn't told Chris. I didn't want to tell him over the phone and it certainly wasn't something that I could send him a text message about. He was headed straight from work to take the boys to their basketball games, so I didn't really have much of an opportunity, even if I'd wanted to. (atleast the right kind of opportunity)

So... off I went to YW that evening, with my secret and the littlepeewee in tow.

We went "heart-attacking" that night, all the while my heart felt like it was attacking!!

I got home, got the kids to bed before remembering that Chris was heading off to his 9pm basketball double header. It's churchball season, you know. So, I guess it will have to wait until tomorrow. I.n.s.a.n.e, right?

By the time I called my doctor the next morning, I had 8 positive white sticks in front of me... (eight)

The conversation went a little like this:

"I think I might be pregnant"

"What do you mean, you *think* you might be pregnant?"

"ummm, I tested positive on a pregnancy test, actually quite a few of them"

"Well, you know, they're pretty accurate?"

After some more back and forth and plenty of emotion on my end, I was scheduled to be seen within the hour. Peewee was off to the neighbors and I was on my way, by myself, because you see... my babydaddy still had absolutely no idea what was going on.

The first thing the nurse had me do was a urine sample before getting me to an exam room. It wasn't long before Dr M came in with a little white stick in his hand. The only thing he said, was a question...

"How many of these tests is it going to take for you to believe that you are pregnant? Congratulations!"

The tears came almost instantly and the final confirmation was the blood test, nearly 24 hours after it had all began in Lisa's office the day prior.

I cried (sobbed, really) all the way home as it finally started to sink in and I realized that I was going to get to give Chris the best.news.ever, the very thing that we'd prayed, pleaded and begged for!

All evening, I kept telling Chris that I needed him to help me get the kids' homework done and off to bed early, because I had a surprise for him, a bit of an early Valentines Day present. :)

I could tell that he was excited as his mind immediately started spinning. I'm quite certain that he was expecting something very, very different. But those thoughts motivated him to get the kids in bed a bit faster!

And finally in bed that night, nearly 36 hours after that very first postive test... I presented him with a little Valentines gift to open:

and nothing has ever been the same.

(thanks, if you're still reading. I've been wanting to write this all down for a while now.)

my little pal....

There's pretty much nothing better than having an adorable little assistant to help you make afternoon treats!

And from the looks of things...

... she's a girl after my own heart!

♥ pure ♥